A List of Personal Laws

Obligatory self-deprecation: I’m writing a blog. Why? This is silly.

Ok, now that that is out of the way, we can get down to business and not to defeat the Huns. I thought I’d take a different tack this time out and shy away from the writing talk. Besides, there is only so many times a writer can talk about writing without everyone getting nauseated by the repetition and the obvious subject choice. So, let’s set fire to the expected stereotypes and roast marshmallows over the merry glow and possibly make smores therewith.

Throughout my life I’ve noticed certain patterns, certain tendencies, that people follow without any awareness thereof. As I paid more and more attention to these general observations, I began to see how much they held true for nearly every situation. Over time, I started thinking of these habits as nearly immutable laws: things that just were. All told there are three of them and I claim them as my own. Ok, I’ll allow others to use them with the proper attribution.

#1 – The Law of Congregation

Have you ever been trying to exit a room and for some inexplicable reason a whole host of people have decided stop and hold an in depth conversation in and around the doorway making your escape impossible? For some odd reason, we as humans have the tendency to congregate in locales—e.g. doorways, hallways, etc.—that are the most inconvenient for everyone else. Don’t ask me why, we just do. The majority of the human race chooses, in defiance of all logic, to gather in the least appropriate spots. I have sought for a satisfactory explanation for this phenomenon for years. I have found none. I suppose I just have to be satisfied with the fact that in knowing this law I can now avoid getting stuck by choosing better routes.

#2 – The Law of Attraction

This law can best be illustrated with a highly specialized example. Have you ever parked your car out in the no-man’s-land of the parking lot, I mean the nearest car is no less than eight spaces away? You do this in the hopes that you just don’t have to deal with people or maybe you know you’re going to have a large haul and you want access to all the doors or you might just might not mind a bit of a walk. But for whatever reason you’ve decided to forgo the frantic search for the elusive front parking space and have left your vehicle out in the boonies with the naïve thought that no one will invade your space. Almost inevitably, upon exiting the building, you’ll find someone right smack dab next to you. Where one person goes others will unavoidably follow. Humans act like magnets. We draw each other all about this mortal sphere. I suppose the only question to ask when knowing this law is where do you want to lead others and where do you want to be led?

#3 – The Law of Intersections

Crossroads, famous for deals with the devil, are where most of life’s problems happen. That’s it. That’s the idea (I thought I’d be more direct this time). Now, these intersections don’t have to be physical ones. Wherever forces, be they people, ideas, institutions, or whatever, are at cross purposes of each other, conflict will arise. This law might seem to be the most obvious of the three, but not necessarily. The law only holds true for crossroads that are two dimensional. As soon as the third dimension is introduced into the equation conflict becomes optional because cross purposes can now travel over and under and around each other without the potential for collision.

I don’t know if I’m the only one that has done this, collected law, I mean, and tried to use them to navigate through life. Part of me just thinks that I’m odd. But whether that’s true or not, I plan on doing it for the rest of my life, collecting laws that is. If I come across any others, I’ll do my best to share them. My hope is they may help someone in at least some small way.